Humans have been secretly abusing aliens for almost 80 years in this big-hearted thriller starring Josh O’Connor as a worried whistleblower and a never-more-magnetic Emily Blunt as a weather forecaster channelling UFO chat

The old school is the new school in this very enjoyable and entirely ridiculous space-alien conspiracy adventure from screenwriter David Koepp and director Steven Spielberg; it is cheerfully mischievous and deadly serious in equal measure. It has something of Hitchcock from North By Northwest, Christopher Nolan from Inception and Spielberg from pretty much every other movie he’s ever made. Spielberg incidentally appears in the trailer for this film, disclosing that, hand-on-heart, he really believes in its contents, in the way I imagine CS Lewis believed in Aslan and the secret Narnian sovereignty of Peter and Susan.

Only Spielberg could get away with taking two of the world’s best-known hoaxes – Roswell and crop circles – and treating them with judicious deadpan respect. With heartfelt idealism, Spielberg also asks us to believe that should the ultimate truth come out, people everywhere would be terribly upset at the way captured aliens have been vivisected. (I suspect that would be very far down the list of our concerns.)

When politicians talk ‘common sense’ it’s time to worry; when the Tory leader does, it’s time to be doubly vigilant

You know how it is. You’re a middle class, straight white man in his 60s in A&E. Possibly the most disadvantaged person in the entire country. You complain of chest pains. In the adjoining triage queue there is a black woman with what looks like a broken toe. You know what happens next. The black woman is seen within minutes. You have a cardiac arrest on the waiting room floor.

Said no one ever. There may be times when there simply aren’t enough staff in the A&E department. There may also be times when a doctor under pressure fails to make the right diagnosis. But no one for a minute believes they are being deliberately kept waiting any longer than necessary. The founding principle of the NHS is predicated on patients being treated according to the severity of their condition.

Whether it’s water-saving showerheads or natural sponges, these easy swaps cut waste and make your bathroom a little kinder to the planet

• The best refillable beauty products for a sustainable routine

As a sustainability journalist, I’ve often despaired at how unsustainable our bathrooms are – from water use to plastic bottles to chemical-heavy cleaners. However, there are ways to reduce their carbon footprint. As water becomes increasingly precious, hacks for our loos that cap its usage are useful, as are smart showerheads that cut down on water, particularly as baths these days feel like a guilty indulgence.

Swap plastic-packaged and chemical-loaded products, such as bleach and multipurpose sprays, for eco-friendly ones, and buy secondhand good-as-new fixtures. From bamboo loo roll to solid shampoo bars, here are my tips for a more planet-friendly bathroom.

Sabrina Carpenter, a car crash, a urinal, Kate Moss and, of course, those perplexing green lasers: Confessions II has it all. Let’s make some sense of it …

Madonna’s new video is called Confessions II because it’s the follow-up to her album Confessions on a Dance Floor, released in 2005. Nope, wrong: that was not more than 20 years ago. That was last week. Years are for little people. Madonna can hold back the passage of time with the power of her imagination, and that has always been true. But what, exactly, in a 10-minute video that brought the house down at the Tribeca festival and has since been watched more than a million times on YouTube, is Madonna trying to say? It feels a bit rude to ask, like asking Jackson Pollock what all the squiggly lines mean. So think of it as a homage to the woman who invented rudeness.

The president’s new Craposseum is the perfect venue for Vance, Hegseth and others to battle for favour. Fight, fight, fight indeed

On behalf of the US administration, the American embassy in London has published a notice advising the UK government not to ban social media for the under-16s. Thanks, but … we didn’t ask? Or perhaps that’s uncharitable. It’s actually a privilege to take child protection lectures from a country where the leading cause of death in children and adolescents is gunshot wounds. Are we allowed to suggest a surprisingly obvious way to help with that grimly perennial problem – or is international advice just a one-way street?

Either way, lectures from Donald Trump’s administration have not been in short supply in recent days, with the US defence secretary deciding that a D-day commemoration address was a seemly moment to dump all over Europe. It’s always painful to be reminded of Pete Hegseth, with his fundamentalist “body art” and Mr Whippy hair – primarily because it dilutes the purity of one’s loathing for JD Vance. (Who, it won’t have escaped you, was also on the international lecture circuit last week.) But standing at the podium in Normandy, Hegseth had just phoned in some stuff about how wars are won, when he got to the needle-scratch subject-change you sensed he’d made the transatlantic journey for. “Sadly,” began this here-it-comes moment, “today, different European beaches are stormed by different, dangerous ideologies. Beaches in Spain, Italy, Greece and Bulgaria, boats and men arrive.”

Marina Hyde is a Guardian columnist

Once mocked internationally, the UK became a gastronomic hotspot in recent decades – London was hailed as the foodie capital of the world. Now many Michelin-starred restaurants have closed and the rot is spreading

It’s 9am on a weekday morning and although I’ve just finished my porridge, the chef Richard Wilkins is making my mouth water. “My signature dish is soft Scottish langoustines wrapped in very thin, crispy pastry, served with Japanese sushi rice and a langoustine bisque.”

His other specialities include turbot in a spinach and champagne sauce, buttery wagyu steak with English peas, and raspberry millefeuille. Sadly, I won’t be able to sample any of them and neither will anyone else. At the end of April, Wilkins took the painful decision to close his west London Michelin-listed Restaurant 104 after seven years.

Crowds, including people in masks and hoods, burned vehicles and properties after calls for demonstrations from far-right figures

• Anti-immigration protesters in Belfast set bus on fire amid unrest over knife attack – live

Protests against immigration have erupted into violence in Northern Ireland after far-right activists called for demonstrations in response to a stabbing attack that was captured in a graphic video.

Crowds including masked men burned vehicles and houses and blocked roads in and around Belfast on Tuesday night, hours after Elon Musk, Tommy Robinson and other agitators exhorted people to take to the streets.

Iran’s Revolutionary Guards Corps says it has targeted an airbase in Jordan hosting US forces, as well as Kuwait and Bahrain, in response to US strikes

• Trump launches strikes against Iran after downing of US army helicopter

US House speaker Mike Johnson is among the many senior American officials who have been playing down the significance of the strikes.

He called the strikes on Iran “targeted”, “proportional” and “defensive in nature.”

Platner, whose campaign was hit by series of negative headlines, to face Susan Collins in key midterm contest

Graham Platner, a Marine veteran, oyster farmer and progressive activist, has scaled a mountain of personal controversies to win the Democratic nomination for the US Senate in Maine.

His victory on Tuesday caps a remarkable rise for a candidate who has never held elected office and whose campaign was shadowed by negative headlines that might have ended a more conventional political career.

Chair of prisons and detention watchdog concerned about intimidating effect as wide-ranging and damning review published

• Grim reality of prison conditions laid bare in damning report

Staff at an immigration detention centre wore England flags pinned to their uniforms while guarding migrants, a report from the prisons and detention watchdog has revealed.

Their use by staff at one of the Home Office’s short-term holding facilities to detain migrants is revealed in the Independent Monitoring Boards’ national annual report, published on Wednesday, which is based on 127 annual reports about different prisons, young offender institutions and immigration detention centres.